Readings for today: Exodus 4-6, Psalm 18
We all second-guess ourselves. We all question ourselves at times. Especially when we are about to make significant decisions or take great risks. I remember when I was thinking about asking my wife to marry me. Although I was pretty sure she would say “yes” after a year or so of dating, there were no guarantees. So I second-guessed myself. I wasn’t worthy of her love. I wasn’t the man she needed me to be. I didn’t have great job prospects after college. I wouldn’t be able to provide for her like I felt she deserved. I remember when I was getting ordained. Although I was pretty sure God had called me, I didn’t feel worthy to serve Him in this way. I know my sin. I know my struggles. I know my fears. I know my doubts. I wondered if these things disqualified me. I’ve served three churches since graduating from seminary. The risks in each situation were great. Things could have gone very wrong and in one case did. There were no guarantees that I would be successful in leading those churches. I was anxious at times. Struggled with self-confidence. Wondered at certain moments if I should go and do something else. But through it all, God was faithful. He kept encouraging me and working with me and challenging me to surrender more and more of my life to Him.
The same is true for everyone we encounter in Scripture, including great leaders like Moses. Today’s reading includes one of my favorite stories. I love how vulnerable Moses is before God. He expresses his fears and doubts. He wonders if he’s the right man for the job. He struggles to accept God’s call on his life. And how does God respond? He is patient. He works with Moses. Encourages Moses. Even gets stern and challenges Moses. As a result, Moses goes back to Egypt. Back to the place where he was wanted for murder. Back to the place where he grew up. He goes back to face his fears and failures. And he takes nothing with him except a staff and a promise from God. It’s a powerful example of how God can use anyone to accomplish His purposes.
Perhaps you know how Moses feels? Perhaps you’ve second-guessed yourself a time or two? Perhaps you have fears and questions and doubts? We all do. And the great news is God invites us to share those things with Him. He invites us to be vulnerable before Him. And He encourages us to remember it is not by our might or our power or our wisdom that we make our way in this world. It is by God’s Spirit. Read and re-read Psalm 18 today. Let those words fill your heart with the confidence that can only come from God. No matter what challenges you may be facing in your life, know that God is with you! “I love you, Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer, my God, my rock where I seek refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I called to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I was saved from my enemies.” (Psalms 18:1-3 CSB)
Readings for tomorrow: Exodus 7-9, Psalm 19