Readings for today: Ecclesiastes 7-12
It’s never easy to feel under attack. Never easy to have your integrity questioned. Never easy to feel falsely accused or have your reputation trashed or your character assassinated. The last two years have been some of the hardest I’ve experienced in ministry. The amount of pressure on pastors and other ministry leaders has been enormous. And I know we are not alone. Teachers, healthcare workers, first responders, political leaders, basically anyone in the public eye has felt the stress of being caught in the cultural crossfire. COVID, ethnic tension, economic uncertainty, a brutal political season that never seems to end…the list goes on and on. As the pressure increased, families and friendships were torn apart. Tight-knit church families experienced splits. Formerly fruitful business relationships came to an end. People began buckling under the stress, left jobs they once loved, and started over. It’s not been an easy road. If recent polls are correct, almost 40% of pastors have seriously considered leaving ministry altogether due to the pain of the past season. Thankfully, I do not count myself among them though I know many who do. It’s heartbreaking.
Now just because I haven’t considered leaving the ministry doesn’t mean I haven’t experienced pain. I’ve had my integrity questioned. Close friends broke off our relationship due to the choices I made during COVID. Families that I poured my heart and soul into left our church without a word. Brothers and sisters in Christ that I had prayed over, walked alongside during crises, married, baptized, you name it ghosted me and it hurt. In some cases, I heard through the grapevine some of the things they were saying about me in the community. Little of which was true. It didn’t feel good. So what kept me from becoming completely discouraged? What kept me from joining the ranks of those who felt like they needed to pack it in? I think it’s what Solomon shares here in Ecclesiastes.
“It is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting…sorrow is better than laughter…the heart of the wise is in the house of mourning but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth.” (Ecc. 7:2-4) Perspective. This is what has saved me. God’s perspective. Reframing my experience in light of the suffering I have experienced in my own life as well as the incredible suffering I have seen around the world. The reality is I have walked through the valley of the shadow of death. I know the way well. Almost fifteen years ago, the shadow of death fell over my marriage and family. The shadow of death fell over my career. My life was in a death spiral of my own making and when I finally hit rock bottom, I found Jesus waiting there for me. Perspective. Once or twice a year, I am blessed to go to Africa. I get to spend time with the persecuted church. I’ve personally met and gotten to know martyrs. The suffering these brothers and sisters endure for the sake of Christ is overwhelming. Still they find joy. Still they experience peace. Perspective. It’s all about perspective.
Many years ago, someone shared a great quote with me from Charles Spurgeon. “If anyone thinks ill of you, do not despair. You are far worse then they could ever imagine!” ;-) I chuckle every time I think of it. It helps me hold onto perspective. The reality is life in this world is hard. Jesus promised as much. In this world we will face trials. In this world we will undergo tribulation. The only thing that gives us hope in the face of all we have suffered is that Jesus has overcome the world.
Readings for tomorrow: 1 Kings 10-11, 2 Chronicles 9, Proverbs 30-31