Readings for today: Exodus 29-32
I remember my ordination process. It began when I was in college. It involved a lot of study. Attending seminary. Meeting with a committee from my denomination on an annual basis. Written and verbal ordination exams. It was fraught with challenges. Some of those challenges were human and sinful. I was part of a fairly progressive denomination at the time and there were certain people who did not approve of my evangelical faith and tried to make life as hard as possible on me. One of them even attempted to delay my ordination by layering in requirements that were unconstitutional. I was forced to appeal to the highest ecclesiastical court to get them overturned. It was crazy. Then there were my own failures that held me back. My poor performance in college became a barrier to being accepted into seminary. I had to do some remedial work to get in. My insecurities created tension in the process. My pride often got in the way as I struggled to prove myself. I wanted so bad to show everyone I belonged. This summer I will celebrate twenty years of ordained ministry and perhaps the biggest thing I’ve learned as I look back is that I’m simply the chief of sinners. I am not any more or less holy than anyone else. I am no different than anyone else. I am simply one beggar called to tell other beggars where to find bread.
The very first thing that happens after the priests are ordained in Exodus 29 is a sin offering. It’s a recognition that though Aaron and his sons are being set apart, they are no more holy than anyone else. No less in need of the grace of God than anyone else. They are not to stand above the people they serve as if they exist on a higher plane but rather they must be the first to confess their sins. The first to be cleansed by the blood of the sacrifice. The first to consecrate themselves to the Lord. Blood is put on the tips of their ears, the thumbs of their hands, and the big toes of their feet to remind them they are accountable for all they say and do. They have been set apart to serve God and His people. Set apart to honor God with all their lives. Set apart to give the people of Israel living, breathing examples of what it means to live a life of faithfulness before the Lord. And this is not a point of pride but one of humility. Their lives are no longer their own. Their choices are no longer their own. Their time is no longer their own. Their resources are no longer their own. All that they have is God’s to use as He sees fit.
One of the questions I get asked the most is “why do you call yourself one of the pastors here at PEPC?” You never introduce yourself as senior pastor. You never allow your students to call you professor. You never use your title of “Reverend Doctor.” You rarely tell people you went to Princeton. Aren’t you proud of what you’ve accomplished? Of course I am. Don’t you believe you’ve earned the right to such titles by your hard work? I guess I have. So why not embrace your pastoral credentials and authority? Honestly, it’s because every day I am reminded of how deeply inadequate I am. Every day I am reminded of how desperately sinful I am. Every day I am reminded that I am simply a clay jar, a cracked pot, into which God has graciously chosen to deposit the treasure of the gospel. As John Newton once put it, “I am a great sinner but Christ is a great Savior.” Serving Him is reward enough. I have no need for titles or accolades or trophies on a shelf. I simply want to spend my life preaching the gospel and then be forgotten.
What about you? What work has God “ordained” you to do in His Kingdom? How has He set you apart and have you humbly embraced His calling on your life?
Readings for tomorrow: Exodus 33-36