Readings for today: Job 6-9
I had breakfast with my mom yesterday morning. We’ve been having breakfast once a month since right before my father died. We talk about a lot of things. We talk about her friends. We talk about her activities. We talk about our extended family. Most of all, we talk about grief. We talk about the challenges of learning to live alone. Things like starting a fire in the fireplace on a cold evening. Taking the dog on a walk. Fixing little stuff around the house. Things my father always did. We talk about the challenges of cleaning out the house. Letting go of things that remind her of dad. Going through boxes and processing all the memories. Giving away clothes and tools and other things that she no longer has a use for. It’s not easy. There is a weight to it all.
I love how Job talks about his grief. “If only my grief could be weighed and my devastation placed with it on the scales. ” (Job 6:2 CSB) It’s one of the most powerful descriptions I ever seen. It fits what I know about grief. It’s an emotion I am well-acquainted with because of the work I do. I am a pastor. As such, I am often invited to share the grief of those I serve. It may be grief over the passing of a loved one. Grief over the death of a dream. Grief over the loss of a friendship. Grief over the end of a season. Sometimes the grief feels bittersweet like when someone we love dies after living a long and full life. Sometimes the grief feels overwhelming and hard as in the case of a tragedy. I have sat at so many bedsides over the years, gone to many homes, and spent countless hours listening as people processed what they were feeling. All of it a sacred privilege even though the grief is often heavy. Job’s experienced unimaginable grief. The suddenness of it came upon him like a storm. The enormity of it hit him like a ton of bricks. I think that’s why so many appreciate this book. It is raw. It is real. And it resonates deeply with those who have walked a similar road.
Why? It’s a question I hear often in the midst of grief. Why did this happen? Why did this happen now? Why did this happen to this particular person? Why did this happen in this particular way? I hear echoes of these questions throughout the Book of Job as he tries to process his pain. Though Job never does get an answer, he keeps coming back to faith. He keeps drawing on the well that has sustained his life. It’s a powerful reminder that true faith invites the deepest of questions. True faith is not afraid to express doubt or fear. True faith understands that it is our questions, doubts, and fears that ultimately lead us back to God. Listen again to our brother Job, “God is wise and all-powerful. Who has opposed him and come out unharmed? He removes mountains without their knowledge, overturning them in his anger. He shakes the earth from its place so that its pillars tremble. He commands the sun not to shine and seals off the stars. He alone stretches out the heavens and treads on the waves of the sea. He makes the stars: the Bear, Orion, the Pleiades, and the constellations of the southern sky. He does great and unsearchable things, wonders without number.” (Job 9:4-10 CSB)
Readings for tomorrow: Job 10-13