Readings for today: Psalm 119:1-88
I remember the first time I read Psalm 119. I had just become a Christian and I was making the attempt to read through the Bible in a year. My first impressions of this Psalm were not positive. It was long. It felt repetitive. The challenge it presented was overwhelming. The way of life it described seemed very foreign to me at the time and definitely unattainable. Not that I didn’t try. I did! With all my might! I worked as hard as I could to live up to the standard this Psalm sets. I turned the different verses into prescriptions for living.
For example, being in college and struggling with pornography, I memorized verse nine - “How can a young person stay pure? By obeying your word.” I not only memorized that text, I meditated on it day and night as I fought against sexual sin in my life. I exhausted myself trying to stay pure. I worked so hard and all too often failed. I thought purity was the goal. I was wrong. Here’s a second example. I grew up in an alcoholic home and learned to cope with the shame of my father’s addiction through high achievement. I projected a great deal of self-confidence and pride but it was all a cover for my deep insecurities and pain. So I memorized verse twenty-nine - “Keep me from lying to myself; give me the privilege of knowing your instructions.” I not only memorized that text, I meditated on it day and night as I wrestled with my self-esteem. I worked so hard to prove to myself that I was accepted and okay and loved. That I had nothing to be ashamed over. I thought self-confidence was the goal. I was wrong.
As the years passed and I continued to come across this Psalm in my annual Bible reading, something shifted in my heart. I can’t pinpoint a day or a time. I don’t remember when it happened. All I know is that there came a moment when I realized this Psalm is not a PRESCRIPTION for what to do but a DESCRIPTION of who to be. The beauty and brilliance of this Psalm is that it points beyond itself to the love of God from which our love of His commands flows. One cannot love God’s law without first knowing they are loved by God, the great Law-Giver. One cannot embrace God’s commands unless they first believe they are embraced by God Himself. One cannot walk in God’s ways unless one trusts God knows the way to the most joy-filled, peace-filled life. As soon as this realization hit me, I ceased my striving. I stopped trying to white-knuckle my purity. I stopped trying so hard to prove myself to myself and to God. Instead, I simply began resting in His Presence. I began trusting His Spirit to do His sanctifying work in my heart. I read not to “get something out of it” or “to learn how to be a better Christian” but read just to get to know God, the great lover of my soul, more deeply.
This is the heart of Psalm 119. It describes the life of a believer who is fully confident in the unconditional love of God. A believer who’s heart and mind and life has been utterly changed by the grace of God. For such a believer, God’s commands become a delight and a joy for it flows from a heart fully devoted to God. How does this happen? It happens as we open ourselves up to the Holy Spirit’s work. It happens as we continue to spend time with Him day after day. It happens as we read His Word and let it shape who we are and how we live. Simply present yourself to God, friends. Let Him do for you what He has promised - more than you can ever ask or imagine!
Readings for tomorrow: 1 Kings 3-4, 2 Chronicles 1, Psalm 72