Peaks and Valleys

Readings for the day: Psalms 108, 109

One of the things I love to do is climb mountains. In Colorado, we have over 50 mountains that top out at over 14,000 feet. Standing on top of Bierstadt, Longs, Pikes, Antero, Quandry, Grays, Lincoln, Democrat, etc. makes one feel like they are on top of the world. But the journey to get to the top can be brutal. I remember the first time I tried to climb Pikes Peak from the trailhead. 26 miles round trip. We got 12 miles in. One mile from the summit. Clouds started rolling in. We had to turn back. I’ve never been more frustrated. I remember when I was a kid and my dad took us to climb Longs. 16 miles round trip. A hard and treacherous hike. I was 12. My brothers were 10 and 8 respectively. We were supposed to get up at about 1AM to get on the trail. I’ve never prayed so hard in my life! (That dad’s alarm wouldn’t go off...ha!) 

The spiritual life is a lot like climbing mountains. There are peaks and valleys. Despair and exhilaration. Struggle and success. Defeat and victory. That’s what I think of when read today’s Psalms. David is exuberant in his praise in Psalm 108.  “My heart is steadfast, O God! I will sing and make melody with all my being! Awake, O harp and lyre! I will awake the dawn! I will give thanks to you, O Lord, among the peoples; I will sing praises to you among the nations. For your steadfast love is great above the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the clouds. Be exalted, O God, above the heavens! Let your glory be over all the earth!” (Psalms‬ ‭108:1-5) God is good. God is glorious. To serve Him is to experience blessing and salvation. And then, in almost the same breath it seems, David cries out in anguish. Calling curses down on his enemies. “Be not silent, O God of my praise! For wicked and deceitful mouths are opened against me, speaking against me with lying tongues. They encircle me with words of hate, and attack me without cause...May his days be few; may another take his office! May his children be fatherless and his wife a widow! May his children wander about and beg, seeking food far from the ruins they inhabit! May the creditor seize all that he has; may strangers plunder the fruits of his toil!” (Psalms‬ ‭109:1-3, 8-11‬) It’s a brutal Psalm. Painful to read. David is raw in his desire for vengeance. 

It’s easy to dismiss one and embrace the other. Easy to dismiss David’s anger and rage while embracing his love and grace and mercy. It’s easy to try to separate ourselves from David. Differentiate. But then we read this from Jeremiah, “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” (Jeremiah‬ ‭17:9‬) Or this from Jesus, “For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.” (Matthew‬ ‭15:19‬) We remember what Jesus taught in the Sermon on the Mount that to even look at another person with lustful intent makes one guilty of adultery. To harbor anger in one’s heart makes one guilty of murder. Clearly, we cannot trust what’s in our hearts.

Many years ago, I was falsely accused. I was attacked personally and professional. I had an experience where another person tried everything they could to ruin me and my family. They questioned my integrity. They questioned my character. They even questioned my faith. I’ve never been more angry in my life. It was the first time I truly felt I had an enemy. And I am ashamed to admit, deep down in my heart. In dark places I don’t like to acknowledge exist, I prayed for this man’s destruction. I prayed for God to take him out of my life. And I found myself identifying strongly with David in his anger, rage, and pain. I also found God meeting me in those dark places and leading me back to the light. Teaching me that I am capable of great evil just as I am capable of great good. And the only thing that keeps me from becoming an angry, vengeful man is the grace of my Lord Jesus Christ. 

Pride and Popularity

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 24, 1 Chronicles 21, 22, and Psalm 30

More and more studies are being conducted on the impact of social media on our mental health. The results are scary. It is becoming clear that prolonged social media use presents like addiction with similar accompanying symptoms. (Neglect of personal life, mental preoccupation, escapism, etc.) When people attempt to stop using social media, they go through something akin to withdrawal. The more we use social media, the less happy we seem to be and the more socially isolated we become. The comparisons social media invites between our lives and those we are connected to is not good for our well-being. Furthermore, social media (which includes all the different apps with a social component to it) is specifically designed to trigger dopamine “highs” in the brain. Dopamine release is triggered by unpredictability, small bits of information that can be digested quickly, and most importantly, reward cues. (i.e. number of “likes” on FB, number of “followers” on Instagram, number of “retweets” on Twitter, etc.)  

I think about the number of people I know who draw at least part of their self-worth off of the number of friends they have on Facebook. The number of times people hit the “heart” button on an Instagram pic. The number of retweets and likes a pithy phrase gets on Twitter or the amount of views on a YouTube video. Especially young people. But it’s not just social media. I think of the number of pastors I know who draw their self-worth off the number of people who show up on a weekend for worship. I think of the drive there is in most churches for numerical growth. I know some pastors who seem to live or die based on whether they make OutReach Magazine’s  Top 100 list every year. I think of the uncritical assumptions too many Christians make that larger churches must be doing something “right” and smaller churches must be doing something “wrong.” Or the reverse. I think of the number of folks I know who criticize large churches simply because they’re large. I once belonged to a denomination where the salaries of all the pastors in each region were published and voted on each year. I remember one older man who came from a very small church standing up to rail against large church pastors whose salaries were more than his entire church’s budget. Never mind the differences in scale or complexities of the job. He just didn’t like big churches and made his opinions known.  

Why are we so obsessed with numbers? It does seem to be an American phenomenon. I travel the world fairly regularly. I’ve been to China, South Korea, Mexico, Ethiopia, etc. I’ve interacted with pastors from all around the world in lots of different settings. In my experience, they just don’t seem as hung up as we are on numbers. That isn’t to say they ignore them. They pay attention. They evaluate. They are wise and discerning. But there isn’t the emotional attachment American Christians, and especially American pastors - seem to have with attendance, buildings, and budgets. It’s like we get a dopamine “high” every time the sanctuary’s full.  

It’s why I find this story about David in 2 Samuel 24/1 Chronicles 21 so convicting. David wants to number his people. He wants to know the size of his army. He wants to measure his power. His influence. His accomplishments. He wants to feel secure. Safe. In control. The images I have in my head are of third-world despots throwing military parades to show off their strength. David is clearly feeling insecure and in that moment, Satan strikes. He comes along and tempts David according to 1 Chronicles 21 and God allows it to happen according to 2 Samuel 24. The results are tragic. "Thus says the Lord, 'Choose what you will: either three years of famine, or three months of devastation by your foes while the sword of your enemies overtakes you, or else three days of the sword of the Lord, pestilence on the land, with the angel of the Lord destroying throughout all the territory of Israel.' Now decide what answer I shall return to him who sent me." (1 Chronicles‬ ‭21:11-12‬) God is going to teach David a lesson in humility. He is going to teach David where to find his true strength. He is going to teach David where true security lies. In God alone. 

70,000 die from the plague. This is horrific and we cannot understand why God would do such a thing. At the same time, we have to remember that such events take place at the mysterious intersection of God’s will and human freedom. David’s decision has consequences and because David is king, the consequences impact his people. The same is true even for today. The decisions our politicians make impact real people in real life and can cause real pain and suffering. David decides to number his fighting men and around the same time, a plague begins. It is brutal. Virulent. And it kills. Somewhere in David’s mind. In the prophet Gad’s mind. Probably in Joab’s mind and the minds of so many others, these events are related. The plague is perceived as God’s punishment on Israel for David’s sinful choices. And perhaps it is. We cannot dismiss the possibility out of hand for God’s ways are not our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. He has clearly told His people over and over again that there are consequences...real, life-threatening consequences...for sin. God’s justice and righteousness will not be mocked. 

So how do I respond? What does this mean for my life? First and foremost, it leads me to confession. Repentance. It calls to mind all the times I too have placed my faith in numbers. Or my mental health and well-being in the number of likes I get from social media. I am not immune. So I confess my sin before God. Second, it leads me to the cross. To the place where the penalty for my sin was paid. To the place where God’s judgment was fully and completely and utterly satisfied by the death of my Lord. I am not condemned. I need not feel shame. For God has done for me what I could not. Third, it inspires me to live for Him today. To live from that place of grace knowing God has torn down the dividing wall of hostility that exists between us and made peace with me by the blood of His Cross. I am forgiven so I can forgive others. Grace was extended to me so I can extend it to others. Love was shown to me so I can show love to others. I can rest secure in God’s hands.  

The Lord Reigns

Readings for the day: Psalms 97, 98, 99

I find it easy to get discouraged. My wife tells me it’s because I pay far too much attention to the news on my phone and I will readily admit I have a difficult time turning it off. The more I travel globally, the more I find my heart broken. Bombings at three churches in Indonesia. Riots and death in Gaza. Ebola outbreaks in west Africa. Brutal crackdowns on fellows Christians in China. Andrew Brunson imprisoned for his faith in Turkey. The deeper the Spirit takes me into Christ, the more these events effect me. I am often troubled when I pray. I often find myself brooding over the chaos of the world. Wondering when God will finally put an end to it all. 

I am just as troubled for events here at home. The plight of the poor. The racial strife that persists. The rage that seems to simmer under the surface of our society. I am baffled by the ability of people to walk away from relationships they’ve cultivated for years. Troubled by our wide-spread lack of resiliency. Our inability to process disappointment and pain in healthy ways. The deeper the Spirit takes me into Christ, the more I realize how essential forgiveness and reconciliation are to the life of any community. Be it a family, church, school, business, town, etc. We simply cannot survive without it and yet fewer and fewer people seem capable of grace.  

I am broken by the personal experiences I’ve had recently. Walking with a family through the suffering and death of their five-year old son and grandson. Spending time in conversation with them. Praying with them. Loving them. Heart breaking for them. Walking with another friend through a recent cancer diagnosis. A man I respect and admire in so many ways fighting now for his life and his future after a tumor the size of a beach ball was removed from his abdomen. A couple I know struggling to hold their marriage together. Children I love fighting depression and anxiety. Yes, I know this is part of what I signed up for as a pastor but it doesn’t make it any easier. I am no Superman. My heart breaks on almost continual basis for those I love and have the privilege to serve.  

How I needed today’s reading from the Psalms! “The Lord reigns, let the earth be glad; let the distant shores rejoice. Clouds and thick darkness surround him; righteousness and justice are the foundation of his throne. Fire goes before him and consumes his foes on every side. His lightning lights up the world; the earth sees and trembles. The mountains melt like wax before the Lord, before the Lord of all the earth. The heavens proclaim his righteousness, and all peoples see his glory.” (Psalm‬ ‭97:1-6‬) What a declaration of hope! God reigns! Not God will reign. Or God has reigned. But God reigns! The present tense! He reigns over the chaos. He reigns over the pain. He reigns over the disease and death. He reigns over it all. Globally. Domestically. Locally. Personally. God reigns! And because God reigns, I can be glad. Even in the midst of all my fears. Even as I stumble under the weight of all my burdens. Even when I am discouraged or troubled or broken. God reigns. I can rejoice. “Light shines on the righteous and joy on the upright in heart. Rejoice in the Lord, you who are righteous, and praise his holy name.” (Psalm‬ ‭97:11-12‬)

Now I know many will argue this doesn’t change a thing. It’s not like war and violence and sickness and suffering are going away anytime soon. They will use world events as evidence to push back against the idea of a good and holy and righteous and sovereign God. They will argue it’s impossible for God to be all these things when there is so much wrong in the world. This leaves us with one of only two conclusions, so they say. Either God isn’t good. Isn’t holy. Isn’t righteous. And perhaps just doesn’t care. Or God is not sovereign. He is not all-powerful. He doesn’t reign and is at the mercy of the same forces we are that operate with such seeming impunity in our world. And if I didn’t have faith. If I hadn’t encountered God personally. If I didn’t know God on an intimate level, I might be tempted to agree. 

But I believe. I have faith. Even in the darkness, I trust the light will one day dawn. Even when the world is crashing down around me, I trust the One who holds all things in His hands. Even when the lives of those I love seem to be falling apart, I trust the One who holds all things together. God is reigning! God is on His throne! God is sovereignly directing all things for His glorious purposes! So I will sing! I will “sing to the Lord a new song, for he has done marvelous things; his right hand and his holy arm have worked salvation for him. The Lord has made his salvation known and revealed his righteousness to the nations. He has remembered his love and his faithfulness to Israel; all the ends of the earth have seen the salvation of our God.” (‭Psalm‬ ‭98:1-3‬)

All That Really Matters

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 22, 23, and Psalms 57

I recently attended a prayer luncheon where the keynote speaker shared his testimony. Brought up Communist, he became a rising star and leader in a student revolutionary movement in college. His influence became dangerous which led to him leaving his studies to hide out in the mountains of his country. There he continued to draw followers until he and his small group of friends had amassed an army of 150,000. They engaged in guerilla warfare for a number of years until they eventually invaded the capital city and overthrew their own government. He became Prime Minister. For five years he held his position until he eventually was betrayed by his close friend and imprisoned on crimes of corruption. It’s tough to know what’s true and what was politically motivated but in the man’s own words, “he was the chiefest of the chiefs of sinners.” He was a man of violence. A man who lived with a gun in his hand. He was a man of power. A man who enjoyed exercising authority over others. He was a man of great appetites. Using his power and influence to gratify his own desires. His end came as swiftly as his rise to power. 

Because of his great influence, he was put in solitary confinement for years. No bed. No toilet. No place even to wash his hands. He suffered tremendously. He was lonely. He was afraid. One night, he had a vision. Jesus appeared to him. Offered him release in exchange for belief. He didn’t answer right away. Things got worse. In the depths of his pain and heartache, he cried out for Jesus’ return. The next night, the vision came back and this time the man got on his knees. He gave his life to Christ. Everything changed.  

As I listened to this man’s testimony, I was reminded of King David. David too was a man of violence. A man who was raised from a young age to a position of power and influence. A man who used that power and influence to gratify his own desires on more than one occasion. David too was a man of great contradictions. Capable of amazing love and generosity and grace in one moment and brutal, horrifying, seemingly capricious violence in the next. And now here he is at the end of his life still composing praise songs to God!

What are we to make of such a man? Wrong question. What are we to make of such a God? A God who would love a man like David? A man like the one I heard recently? A man like me? We are all people of great contradictions. All of us are capable of great good and great evil. Capable of great beauty and great ugliness. Capable of amazing acts of generosity as well selfish acts of greed. Perhaps this is why David kept writing his poetry? Perhaps he knew this truth deep down? Despite all his sin. Despite every mistake. Despite the people he had hurt along the way. David’s confidence was in the Lord. 

"The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold and my refuge, my savior; you save me from violence. I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies.” 2 Samuel‬ ‭22:2-4‬)

Where is your confidence today? 

Divisions

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 19, 20, 21 and Psalms 5, 38, 42

We are a fickle people by nature. Driven by our emotions, we struggle to forgive. Struggle to reconcile. Struggle to work past our pain. Our differences. Our jealousies. Our frustrations. Our failures. This struggle leads to division as we each go our own way.  

• David grieves for his son Absalom and almost loses his kingdom a second time.  
• The ten tribes of Israel grow jealous of the tribe of Judah and rebel a second time under the leadership of Sheba.
• Shimei comes before the king seeking forgiveness for his rash words when David was fleeing for his life. Abishai wants to execute him on the spot.
• Mephibosheth and Ziba both lay claim to the king’s favor.
• Joab kills Amasa in cold blood out of anger at being relieved of command.
• Israel suffers because of an ungodly act committed by King Saul against the Gibeonites and makes atonement through human sacrifice. 

We humans have a tendency to make a mess of things. It is just so hard for us to take a step back and see the bigger picture. We are highly reactive creatures. Refusing to give others the benefit of the doubt. Refusing to extend grace to those who have hurt us or disappointed us or let us down. We would much rather hold onto our anger. Hold onto our pain. Keep a detailed record of wrongs that we can trot out anytime we feel threatened or afraid. We justify our actions or inactions and the cycle of division continues. 

Think about how we do life these days. We jump from church to church to church, never really putting down roots. Just as soon as we are let down or disappointed, we move on. Always with a “godly” justification, of course. “I’m not being fed.” “I don’t feel connected.” “I don’t like this pastor or that leader or they didn’t meet my needs.” It’s just easier to move down the street to the next church rather than work through our issues. 

Think about the number of different denominations that exist today. While some diversity may be legitimate, the fact that we divide over such petty, non-essential issues is a stain on the Body of Christ. It is direct rebellion against the command of our Lord to be one, even as He and the Father are one.  

But it’s not just churches who have this issue. It is society as a whole. Republicans and Democrats can’t even exist in the same room anymore. Conservatives and liberals see themselves as mortal enemies. How many parents have I watched switch their kid to a different sports team rather than work through disappointment and conflict? (Seriously, how many different soccer or baseball clubs do we really need in Parker?) How many schools and teachers have watched families walk out their door because of a bad experience rather than sit down and work through the issues? The examples are legion in our culture today. 

Division leads to weakness. The inability to face our fears, admit our failures, and work through problems creates a lack of resiliency in both the individual and society as a whole. Emotional. Spiritual. Even physical. We simply lack the capacity to process our pain and disappointments in a healthy way. We look for someone to blame. We attack. We accuse. We react. We rush in. And the results are often tragic. 

So what’s the answer? Confession.  “For my iniquities have gone over my head; like a heavy burden, they are too heavy for me...I am utterly bowed down and prostrate; all the day I go about mourning...I am feeble and crushed; I groan because of the tumult of my heart. O Lord, all my longing is before you; my sighing is not hidden from you.” (‭Psalms‬ ‭38:4, 6, 8-9‬) Humility. “But I, through the abundance of your steadfast love, will enter your house. I will bow down toward your holy temple in the fear of you. Lead me, O Lord, in your righteousness because of my enemies; make your way straight before me.” (Psalms‬ ‭5:7-8‬) Seek God. “As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God?” (Psalms‬ ‭42:1-2‬)

Deeper Prayers

Readings for the day: Psalms 26, 40, 41, 58, 61, 62, 64

What is prayer? Communion with God. On our knees. Folded hands. Eyes closed. Forming thoughts in our minds and sending them upwards like sparks from a fire? Is it a conversation or more of a monologue? A task we have to complete each day if we want to stay on God’s good side? Something we do before meals or before bed? Is it the recitation of memorized words learned as a child and carried through to adulthood? “Now I lay me down to sleep...” “Bless us, O Lord, and these, Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty. Through Christ, our Lord. Amen." “God is great. God is good. Let us thank Him for this food.” “Our Father, who art in heaven...” What is prayer? 

The Psalms are the prayerbook of the Bible. 150 different prayers written by different people on different occasions as they wrestled with life. Readers of the Psalms are always struck by their raw honesty and transparency. The beautiful way they express the deepest emotions of the human heart. The vivid descriptions of God and His great faithfulness. They are marvelous and great teachers when it comes to prayer.  

One of the biggest things I’ve learned in the years I’ve spent meditating on the Psalms is that prayer comes more from the heart than the head. Prayer is less about me forming thoughts or saying words or reciting texts and more about laying before God the deepest emotions of my heart. Deep prayer doesn’t require much in the way of words. Just letting the feelings flow and trusting God is hearing what’s behind them. This is what makes David such a great Psalmist. He doesn’t seem to stop to think about the “appropriateness” of his feelings. He doesn’t seem to “judge” his emotions. He just lets them fly up to God and trusts God is big enough and great enough to make sense out of the chaos. 

It’s why he can express contradictory emotions all in the same prayer. “I hate the assembly of evildoers, and I will not sit with the wicked...O Lord, I love the habitation of your house and the place where your glory dwells.” (Psalms‬ ‭26:5, 8‬) He feels no need to try to make sense of it all. He trusts God can sort it out. 

He can express his anger and desire for vengeance against those who hurt him. “O God, break the teeth in their mouths; tear out the fangs of the young lions, O Lord! Let them vanish like water that runs away; when he aims his arrows, let them be blunted. Let them be like the snail that dissolves into slime, like the stillborn child who never sees the sun...The righteous will rejoice when he sees the vengeance; he will bathe his feet in the blood of the wicked. Mankind will say, "Surely there is a reward for the righteous; surely there is a God who judges on earth." (Psalms‬ ‭58:6-8, 10-11‬) And almost in the same breath, be so tender. “Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.” (Psalms‬ ‭62:8‬)

Ultimately, the Psalms give us permission to be real and authentic before God. To truly be ourselves. To put aside all pretense and performance and let drop the masks we so often wear.  

Consequences of Failing to Forgive

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 16, 17, 18

There are consequences when we fail to forgive from the heart. Consequences when we fail to reconcile. Consequences when we fail to follow God’s will and seek to restore broken relationships. The impact of those consequences tend to be commensurate with the authority and power and influence we wield. So a parent who refuses to take this step with their child can impact future generations. An employer who refuses to take this step with employees can cost a company. A pastor who refuses to take this step with her/his congregation can disrupt a congregation. 

David was a king. A man who held the power of life and death in his hands. A man whose authority was supreme and final. The impact of his decisions impacted not just him or his household but a nation. This is true not only in the Absalom narrative but also at other times in David’s life. There is a ripple effect to the decisions he makes. When he makes good and godly decisions, the nation is blessed. When he makes poor and ungodly decisions, the nation is cursed. As we read yesterday, David’s refusal to execute justice when his daughter Tamar was raped creates a crisis in his family that eventually spreads to the nation. Absalom takes matters into his own hands leading to his exile. David brings him back but refuses to forgive him from the heart and restore him to his place. In his isolation, Absalom begins to conspire to steal the kingdom. David seems blissfully unaware as the Absalom’s influence grows. He’s almost caught completely by surprise when the news finally comes and he has to flee for his life. The ripples grow as allegiances shift and new alliances are formed. Ahithophel sides with Absalom. Hushai with David. Joab goes with David so Absalom makes Amasa his new general. Abiathar and Zadok stay in Jerusalem as priests but remain loyal to David. Shimei curses David. Ziba makes his move to take over what’s left of the household of Saul. Everyone, it seems, is looking out for themselves. Such is the chaos that happens when forgiveness and reconciliation are ignored. It leads to all kinds of brokenness, suffering, and pain. 

We’ve all probably had this experience. A friend says something or does something that hurts. We refuse to forgive. Now the rest of our friends feel forced to choose sides. A marriage breaks up. Divorce papers are signed. Once again, friends and family feel forced to take sides. A business deal goes south. Partners split up. Lawyers are called to divide up the assets. Clients and customers are pressured to shift their loyalties. Seasons of ministry come to an end. Pastors are let go. Forced out in some cases. Congregations split. Such experiences are painful and never easy. Too many of us take the path of least resistance which is avoidance. Abandoning the relationships we once enjoyed because forgiveness is too hard. Reconciliation too much. The way of Jesus too difficult.  

And yet, His words continue to haunt us. Continue to push us. Continue to convict us. Forgiveness and reconciliation is ESSENTIAL to the Christian life. Face to face, coming to terms with our brothers and sisters is REQUIRED by Jesus if we are to call ourselves His disciples. We are not given any other options. Any other choices. Jesus wants His family to be unified not just in name but from the heart.  

 “Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us...For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” (‭Matthew‬ ‭6:12, 14-15‬)

 “Then Peter came up and said to him, "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” (Matthew‬ ‭18:21-22‬)

 “And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses." (Mark‬ ‭11:25‬)

Think of the pain that could have been avoided had David listened to God. Think of the pain in our own lives that could be avoided if only we would listen to God. Who is Jesus calling you to forgive today?

The Brave New World of the Bible

Readings for the day: Psalms 3, 4, 13, 28, 55

The Bible is such a strange book. One of the great mysteries of history is why this book survived when so many others were lost. Why has this book exerted such a gravitational pull on human beings of every tribe, tongue, and nation down throughout the centuries? Why is it that three billion people in the world today claim to follow its teachings? It certainly is not an easy read. Sixty-six different books written at different times by different authors. Hundreds of chapters. Thousands of verses. It’s hard to get through even in a year. Then there’s the content. War. Ethnic cleansing. Rape. Murder. Deceit. Privilege. Power. The “spiritual heroes” the Bible lifts up as examples are all deeply flawed. Abraham almost sacrifices his son. Jacob schemes his way to the top. Moses is a murderer. Noah is a drunk. David steals another man’s wife and then has him killed when he won’t participate in the coverup. These are the men after God’s own heart? Can you be serious?

This morning, I was re-reading a wonderful essay by Karl Barth. Barth is considered the greatest theologian of the 20th century and he insightfully points out that we often come to the Bible asking all the wrong questions. He writes, “It is precisely not the right human thoughts about God that form the content of the Bible, but rather the right thoughts of God about humans. The Bible does not tell us how we are supposed to talk with God, but rather what God says to us. It does not say how we are to find our way to Him, but how God has sought and found the way to us. It does not show the right relationship into which we must place ourselves with Him, but the covenant which God has made with all those who are the children of Abraham in faith, and which God has sealed in Jesus Christ once and for all. This is what stands in the Bible. The Word of God stands in the Bible.” 

What makes the Bible different than every other book in history is that it contains within its pages the very Word of God. It tells a story. A grand narrative about God’s eternal search for man. He is relentless. He is steadfast. He is patient. He never tires. Never rests. Never relaxes. Never takes a day off. He pursues. He chases. He keeps covenant faithfulness with His people. He is loyal. He is true. Despite all they do. Despite all their sin. Despite all the corruption and degradation and evil, God never leaves them. This is why a man like David can compose poetry after stealing Bathsheba and having Uriah killed. Because this story isn’t about David. It’s about God and what God’s doing in David’s life.  

 “But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head.” (Psalms‬ ‭3:3‬)

 “In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.” (Psalms‬ ‭4:8‬)

 “I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me.” (Psalms‬ ‭13:6‬)

 “The Lord is the strength of his people; he is the saving refuge of his anointed.” (Psalms‬ ‭28:8‬)

 “But I call to God, and the Lord will save me.” (Psalms‬ ‭55:16‬)

Now I get these verses are interspersed among a whole lot of other stuff that’s not nearly as pleasant. Calls for vengeance. Calls for the bloody destruction of David’s enemies. Bitterness. Anger. Feelings of betrayal and loss. There’s a whole lot of darkness in the Psalms and yet even amidst the deep darkness, God’s light has this way of breaking through. God has this way of making Himself known.  

Such is true for us as well. When we honestly come before God. When we cry out to him from the deepest places of our hearts. When we throw off every pretense and lay aside our “holy facades”. What does God hear? Fear. Desperation. Pain. Struggle. Heartache. Anger. Bitterness. All of us have a deep well of darkness within us called sin. All of us draw from that well every single day. Left to ourselves, we would wander in the darkness permanently. We would have no hope of escape. But thanks be to God that He still pursues His people! Still chases after us with His love! He will never rest until His light scatters the darkness of our hearts and makes all things new.  

Dysfunctional Families

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 13, 14, 15

All families live with some level of dysfunction. Dysfunction occurs where unhealthy behavior (rage, addiction, abuse, neglect, etc.) is normalized, leading members of a family to make unhealthy accommodations rather than pursue repentance, forgiveness, and reconciliation. Left unchecked, dysfunction leads destructive patterns of behavior that often impact generations as unhealthy coping skills are passed down from parent to child. Breaking generational cycles of sin is extremely difficult and requires incredible courage as well as sacrifice as dysfunctional family systems often violently resist change. 

Consider the family of King David as the pre-eminent Biblical example of a dysfunctional family system. Of course, his situation was made much more complex by the cultural practice of polygamy which led to many children by many different wives and concubines, all seeking to ascend the line of succession. Dynastic considerations complicate what we read today but many lessons can be drawn that are helpful in our own lives. Amnon is the oldest son of David and heir apparent to the throne. As such, he has grown accustomed to power and privilege and simply taking what he wants when he wants it. His treatment of Tamar, his half-sister, is horrific in its own right but probably emblematic of how Amnon lives his life. Absalom is not much better. What begins as a noble desire to protect his sister from public shame ends in murder and a coup attempt against his own father. Who knows what prompted Absalom’s move against David but it clearly was pre-meditated and even assisted by some of David’s closest confidants. David doesn’t help matters much. As king, he should have punished Amnon for his crime but instead appears to give him a pass. Once Absalom takes matters into his own hands, David appears both relieved and appalled. He refuses to forgive and reconcile with Absalom which only isolates him further and divides the royal household. David chooses to ignore the growing conspiracy until its almost too late and thus has to flee into exile. His family shattered. His kingdom divided. His country on the brink of civil war. 

I think of my own family system. We’ve spent the last year in counseling together as we try to break patterns of sin that have not only been passed down but reinforced by our own sinful choices. I have had to learn to deal with my anger issues. Wrestle with my own fears and failures and disappointments. I’ve had to face the fact that I have caused my children pain through the choices I’ve made in how I’ve responded to the difference circumstances we’ve had to face as a family. I’ve had to take a long hard look at myself through Christ’s eyes and repent. Ask for forgiveness. And pursue reconciliation. It’s not easy. It requires humility and sacrifice. I have to relinquish my need for control. My need to protect my kids from the consequences for the choices they make in life. My need to project “success” to the world around me. I’ve had to come to grips with the fact that my family is as broken as any and I am a major contributor to that brokenness because of my own sin issues. Honestly, it’s a painful journey. Then again, dying to self is always painful. 

What about your family system? If your family’s story was included in the Scriptures, what would others see?  What failures? What successes? Would they see patterns of repentance, forgiveness, and reconciliation? Or would they see pride, neglect, abuse, addiction, and rampant conflict? Or perhaps a mixture of both? Where is Christ at work in your family right now? What areas do you need Christ to pay particular attention to in order to bring healing, wholeness, grace and peace? Are there particular family members you need to be praying specifically for? Who are they? What are the issues? How are you contributing to the pain? Ask Christ to help you chart a different path. One that leads to true transformation. 

Sin and Salvation

Readings for the day: Psalms 32, 86, 102, 103, 122

The more I spend time with people, the more I am convinced that so much of our pain and heartache and struggle is because we do not truly understand who we are. We have a distorted self-image. We look in the mirror and we are blind to the true nature of the person looking back at us. This is why reading and re-reading and re-reading Scripture is so important. Within the pages of this precious book, God teaches us the deepest truths about ourselves.  The narrative runs something like this...

•  “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” (Genesis‬ ‭1:27‬) You and I were designed to live in a world of perfection. A paradise called Eden. We were made in the image of God so that we might show forth the glory of God. We were given dominion and authority and power to rule over all God has made as a kind of vice-regent or undershepherd. 
• “Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.” (Psalms‬ ‭51:5‬) We abandoned our vocation. We rebelled against God. We aspired to be gods ourselves. In so doing, the image of God was marred. Corrupted. Poisoned. Every single human being since Adam and Eve’s fall has been born in brokenness. Born in sin. Conceived in iniquity. From the moment the sperm fertilizes the egg, we are lost. 
• “Jesus answered him, "Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God." (John‬ ‭3:3‬) We are lost but we are not hopeless! Out of love, the Father sent His only Son into the world that whosoever would believe in Him would not perish in their sin. All who believe in Christ are born again. Born a second time. This time of the Spirit.
• “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭5:17‬) Being born of the Spirit literally changes our DNA. Changes the fundamental reality of our existence. Gives us a new nature. A new heart. A heart of flesh sensitive to the leading of God to replace the heart of stone that was so rebellious and resistant. The image of God is now restored. Our vocation renewed. The commission re-issued. Go. Make disciples of all nations. Baptize. Teach. Fill the earth. Subdue. Have dominion. Share my glory with all of creation.
• “In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised imperishable, and we shall be changed.” (1 Corinthians‬ ‭15:52‬) The final promise. Jesus will come again. On the last day, a trumpet shall sound. The heavens will open. The dead will rise. And we shall be changed from one degree of glory to another. The imperfect shall be made perfect. The perishable shall be made imperishable. Sin and death will be destroyed. Eternity sets in. We are home.  

This is the fundamental worldview of the Psalmist. It’s the fundamental narrative they are singing about though the revelation of Jesus as Messiah still lies far off in the future. They trust in the steadfast love and faithfulness of the Father to bring about His will on the earth. They also understand this side of heaven that we are broken, sinful, corrupt creatures in desperate need of God’s grace. And grace only comes as we confess. As we repent. It’s more than feeling bad. More than feeling guilty. More than feeling ashamed. It’s about turning from our sin. Turning towards God. Making the necessary changes in our lives in response to all God has done for us.  “Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered...I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, "I will confess my transgressions to the Lord," and you forgave the iniquity of my sin.” (Psalms‬ ‭32:1, 5‬)

What do you need to confess today? Where have you fallen short? Where do you feel enslaved? Afflicted? Ashamed? Guilty? In what areas of your life has the Spirit brought conviction? Is it your thoughts? Attitudes? Actions? Feelings? The life of a believer in Jesus is one of constant confession as we come before the Lord acknowledging our sin, receiving His grace, and learn to follow in His ways. Does this mean we should live our lives in constant guilt? Live our lives in constant shame? Absolutely not! God’s love is everlasting! And His promise is sure! “For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.” (Psalms‬ ‭103:11-12‬) Cling to the love of God, sinner! Let His love be the cornerstone of your life! Let His grace set you free! Trust in His faithfulness to save you from depths of your sin!

#MeToo

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 11, 12, 1 Chronicles 20, and Psalms 51

It is estimated by the World Health Organization that 1/3 of women worldwide are victims of sexual abuse. A 2017 poll taken by ABC News and the Washington post reports that 54% of American women have reported receiving unwanted and inappropriate sexual advances, most of which is never addressed. The #MeToo movement first got started in 2006 when Tarana Burke used the hashtag in social media to draw attention to the struggle of women of color, particularly in underprivileged communities. However, it really gained steam when the allegations of Harvey Weinstein were first made public in 2017 and it has since spread like wildfire through all sorts of different industries. Hollywood. Media. Corporations. Government. And yes, even the church. 

Frankly, the reckoning is long overdue. For too long, the church has protected men who abuse and men who tolerate abuse. High profile cases in the Roman Catholic Church are matched with similar high profile cases in the Protestant world such as the Sovereign Grace scandal or the recent allegations made against Bill Hybels and Willow Creek. In a social media world, there is no longer any place to hide which is a very good thing.  

The great heroes of the Bible have their own #MeToo moments. The story of David and Bathsheba is perhaps the most famous. David, flush with his success on the battlefield and drunk on his own power and privilege, decides to stay home rather than head off to war. As he stands on the roof, proudly overlooking all he has accomplished, he catches a glimpse of the beautiful Bathsheba bathing beneath him. He heart fills with lust. He covets this beautiful woman and who’s around to stop him? The army is off at war. Her husband is one of David’s mighty men which suggests David knew Bathsheba already. Perhaps this was a secret desire he’d been entertaining for years. He calls for her. Commands her to come. With her life on the line, she obeys and conceives a child from their one night stand. Now comes the coverup. David sends for Uriah but Uriah refuses to cooperate. So David orchestrates his murder. 

It’s a horrible story. One we cannot and should not reduce to a morality tale. Bathsheba is raped. Uriah murdered. A child dies. All because of David’s insatiable lust and appetite for power. Left to his own devices, David might have gotten away with it. But God was watching. God is always watching. “For you did it secretly, but I will do this thing before all Israel and before the sun.” (2 Samuel‬ ‭12:12‬) God sends Nathan the prophet, David’s own brother you’ll remember, to confront him. Nathan risks his life to stand up to David. Expose his sin. Call him out. 

Yesterday, legendary Bible teacher Beth Moore penned a poignant essay on her blog about her experiences with men over the years. It’s a heartbreaking read. She shares how it’s felt to be dismissed, ignored, put down, disrespected, and objectified. Her words are honest. Direct. Forthright. And offered in a spirit of Christ-like confrontation and love. They must be heard and she’s not alone. There are women who occupy the pews and seats every Sunday who’ve had similar experiences and they too must be heard. Their stories must be shared. And men who occupy places of privilege and power must humble themselves to listen. To repent. Like David. 

Psalm 51 is a beautiful Psalm. It expresses exactly what godly, humble repentance looks like. It acknowledges honestly our brokenness. Acknowledges honestly our sin. And begs God to create in us a clean heart. A right spirit. A broken and contrite, God will not despise. 

History

Readings for the day: Psalms 65, 66, 67, 69, 70

I still remember one of my professors in college walking to the board on the first day of class and writing in big block letters the word, “HISTORY.” “History”, she said, “is all about ‘his’ story and the first thing we need to do is reclaim this word for the rest of us.” She then took out an eraser and re-wrote “HISTORY” as “HERSTORY” or “HYSTORY.” Now, admittedly, this was a Women’s Studies course at the University of Colorado at Boulder. So perhaps I should have expected something like this. And my initial reaction was pretty sarcastic and dismissive. However, over the years, I have come to believe the professor was more right than she knew at the time. History truly is “HIS STORY.” That is to say, it’s God’s story. It’s the story of God’s engagement with His world and His people. 

The Psalms express these deep theological truths so very well. David writes about creation. “O God of our salvation, the hope of all the ends of the earth and of the farthest seas; the one who by his strength established the mountains, being girded with might; who stills the roaring of the seas, the roaring of their waves, the tumult of the peoples, so that those who dwell at the ends of the earth are in awe at your signs. You make the going out of the morning and the evening to shout for joy.” (Psalms‬ ‭65:5-8‬) He writes about redemption. “Come and see what God has done: he is awesome in his deeds toward the children of man. He turned the sea into dry land; they passed through the river on foot. There did we rejoice in him, who rules by his might forever, whose eyes keep watch on the nations— let not the rebellious exalt themselves.” (Psalms‬ ‭66:5-7‬) He speaks to God’s sovereignty. “Let the peoples praise you, O God; let all the peoples praise you! Let the nations be glad and sing for joy, for you judge the peoples with equity and guide the nations upon earth.” (Psalms‬ ‭67:3-4‬) He speaks to God’s tenderness and comfort. “But as for me, my prayer is to you, O Lord. At an acceptable time, O God, in the abundance of your steadfast love answer me in your saving faithfulness.” (Psalms‬ ‭69:13‬) The beauty of the Psalms truly is the full range of human emotion and experience that gets expressed. 

When you reflect back on your own life, what do you see? Do you see God’s hand at work? Do you sense God’s presence in times of crisis? Are you able to see God’s sovereign hand guiding and directing your steps? Where have you experienced God’s love? When did you encounter God’s grace? God is just as active in our personal histories as He is in human history.  

The Lord’s Side

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 10, 1 Chronicles 19, Psalms 20, 53, 60, 75

The Super Bowl had just ended. The Eagles won an improbable victory behind their backup quarterback Nick Foles. The confetti is raining down. The music is blaring. The players are celebrating on the field. A reporter finds Doug Pederson and asks him for his reaction to the big win. "I can only give the praise to my Lord and savior Jesus Christ for giving me this opportunity.“ Nick Foles, newly crowned MVP, sees God’s hand in the big win as well. “All glory to God!” He exclaims. It’s a common scene that gets played out after almost every big win in every sport college or professional across the US every year. Players and coaches honoring God for their big wins. Thankful to God for providing the victory. 

It reminds me of David’s words from Psalms 20.  “Now I know that the Lord saves his anointed; he will answer him from his holy heaven with the saving might of his right hand. Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.” (Psalms‬ ‭20:6-7‬) David has just won significant victories over the Ammonites and Syrians. He has subdued their lands. Defeated their armies. Killed their generals. Historians of this particular time tell us David was a powerful warlord who took advantage of a power vacuum in the region to carve out his kingdom. Egypt, the dominant power for so long, was weak. Assyria and Babylon had yet to rise. As David wins victory after victory, he steps up to the postgame mic to give God all the glory. 

Now there’s nothing wrong with ascribing to God all the glory for our successes in life. After all, He is the one who gave us our gifts and talents. He is the one who provides blessing and opportunity. We didn’t choose where we were born. We didn’t choose the family we were born into. So much of our success has nothing to do with us at all and so God rightly deserves all the praise. At the same time, we must not become arrogant. We must not assume God is “always” on our side or that God is “always” on the side of the victors. In a few chapters, David will find out what happens when he takes God’s favor for granted. I have often watched the same athletes who praised God in victory have nothing to say in defeat. I have seen Christians praise God when things are going well in their lives only to question where God is when times get tough. 

One of my favorite coaches, Mike MacIntyre of my Colorado Buffaloes, won a big victory a few years back. A reporter caught up with him as he was running off the field. “God was with us in the victory today but He was also with us through every defeat leading up to this point.” Now that’s a man who understands God! You may be experiencing a season of great blessing in your life right now. A season of success. A season where everything you touch seems to turn to gold. Or you may be experiencing loss. Tragedy. Struggle. Heartbreak. No matter what season you find yourself in, God is with you! God is for you! God will never leave you or forsake you! Simply turn to Him and you will find your joy and your strength no matter what comes. 

Grace

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 8, 9 and 1 Chronicles 18

There’s a famous story told about John Knox, the founder of Presbyterianism in Scotland. He had a nightmare as he lay dying. When he awoke, he told all his friends that he had just been tempted to believe he had earned heaven and God’s grace through the faithfulness of his life and ministry. But he quickly followed that up with these words, “Blessed be God who enabled me to bead down and quench the fiery dart, by suggesting to me such passages of Scripture as these; “What hast thou that thou didst not receive? ‘By the grace of God I am what I am’. ‘Not I but the grace of God which was with me’.

It is so easy to think we deserve God’s grace. It’s so easy to believe we’ve done enough. We’re good enough. We’re strong enough. We’ve worked hard enough. Yes, most of know the dictionary definition of grace - “unmerited favor” - but if we’re honest, deep down we like to think we deserve it. Don’t believe me? Think about how much we take God for granted? How little we value our time with Him? How easy it is for us to prioritize other things rather than keep God first? Think about our attitudes towards worship? Towards obedience? We like to act as if God is grading on a curve! We are so flippant about grace. 

Today, however, we come face to face with grace in the story of David and Mephibosheth. David is now king. He has the nation firmly united behind him. He is winning battle after battle. Expanding their territory. Gaining tribute. Philistines. Moabites. Syrians. Edomites. All fall before him. Most kings, in their efforts to consolidate power, would seek out the last surviving members of the former royal family and have them put to death. Not David. David remembers his covenant with Jonathan. David remembers his promise to Saul. He seeks out the last surviving members of Saul’s family in order to honor them. Bless them. 

Enter Mephibosheth. Crippled. Weak. Broken. Living in abject poverty - Lo-debar literally means “no pasture” - where he has fled to hide. For years, he has eked out an existence hoping to escape the notice of the new king. Knowing what would likely happen should he be found out. But now he’s been betrayed. His location is known. The king’s soldiers show up to bring him before David. One can imagine his fear. One can imagine all the nightmare scenarios running through his head. He comes before David and bows his face to the floor at his feet. He begs for mercy though he knows he doesn’t deserve it. And what’s David’s response? Grace. 

Friends, we are Mephibosheth. We are crippled. Weak. Broken. We too live in abject spiritual poverty. We too have fled to hide from the King. Many of us have lived this way for years. Putting our heads down and barely eking out an existence. Enslaved to our sin, we tried as best we could to escape God’s notice. But the Holy Spirit sees all and knows all. He found us out! He sought us out! He brought us before the King of Kings and Lord of Lords! Perhaps you remember the day that happened? The first day you actually humbled yourself before Jesus? I remember my fear as the weight of my sin hit me for the first time. I remember the sense of impending judgment hanging over my head. I remember how unworthy I felt before the Holy One of Israel. I remember asking God for mercy as I prayed the “sinner’s prayer.” And what I remember most of all is that feeling the first time grace washed over me. 

Grace has nothing to do with me. Nothing to do with what I’ve done. Nothing to do with how good I am. It has everything to do with God. By showering us with grace, God is being faithful to Himself. Faithful to the covenant promises He has made. Grace takes the wounded, crippled, and broken and sets a place for them at God’s table. Grace seeks out the spiritually disabled, those lost and wandering in darkness, enslaved to sin, dead in their trespasses and presents them before God. Grace goes to the most barren places, rescues the spiritually poor, and brings them to a place of plenty, where we are fed with the richest of fare. Most of all, grace takes those orphaned by sin and adopts them into God’s own family! 

Now here’s what we most often miss about grace. It doesn’t take away our brokenness. Mephibosheth remained crippled for the rest of his life. In the same way, we too remain crippled by our sinful nature. Why does God allow this? Again, the answer is grace. As Mephibosheth limped around the palace, leaning on his crutches, he was reminded over and over again of the amazing grace of the king. As you and I continue our struggle with sin. Tempted. Afflicted. Oppressed. We are being reminded over and over again of the amazing grace of our own King. That takes a wretch like me. Once lost. Now found. Once blind but now can see. 

Who’s Building Your House?

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 7, 1 Chronicles 17, and Psalms 1, 2, 33, 127, 132 

 “Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain.” (Psalms‬ ‭127:1‬)

One of the things I struggle with the most is my desire to be successful. To make my life count. To do something significant. To strive to be the best. These are values ingrained in me from an early age. They are not necessarily bad in and of themselves. The problem is I too often let these good things become ultimate things in my life. I start to pursue success at the expense of my relationship with God or those I love. I focus on the future rather than finding contentment in the present. I covet what I don’t have rather than be thankful for what I do have.  

About a year or so ago, the Lord spoke to me during a time of prayer. It wasn’t an audible voice or a lightning bolt from heaven or anything like that. It was simply an impression in my heart. A feeling in my gut. A few random thoughts in my head that suddenly coalesced into a message I needed to hear. It was a short message. Three simple words. Obscurity. Anonymity. Insignificance. I was journaling and these three words started ringing over and over again in my head. Obscurity. Anonymity. Insignificance. Over the years I’ve learned to pay attention to these kinds of things in my prayer time so I sat back from my keyboard and asked the Lord to give me further insight into what He was saying. God said, “I want you to labor in obscurity. Embrace anonymity. Pursue insignificance.” To be honest, my first thought was, “Wait a minute! That doesn’t sound right! Frankly, it sounds unAmerican!” God’s answer? “Exactly.” :-)  

“Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain.” King David has a desire to build God a house. It’s a godly desire. A good desire. One that is affirmed by Nathan the prophet. But it is not the Lord’s will. “But that same night the word of the Lord came to Nathan, "Go and tell my servant David, 'Thus says the Lord: Would you build me a house to dwell in?...'Thus says the Lord of hosts, I took you from the pasture, from following the sheep, that you should be prince over my people Israel. And I have been with you wherever you went and have cut off all your enemies from before you. And I will make for you a great name, like the name of the great ones of the earth. And I will appoint a place for my people Israel and will plant them, so that they may dwell in their own place and be disturbed no more. And violent men shall afflict them no more, as formerly, from the time that I appointed judges over my people Israel. And I will give you rest from all your enemies. Moreover, the Lord declares to you that the Lord will make you a house. When your days are fulfilled and you lie down with your fathers, I will raise up your offspring after you, who shall come from your body, and I will establish his kingdom. He shall build a house for my name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever.” (2 Samuel‬ ‭7:4-5, 8-13‬) I love how God flips the tables on David here. It is not David who will build God a house but God who will build David a house! It is not David who will make His own name great but God who will make David’s name great!

Unless God builds the house. Unless God builds David’s house. Unless God builds our house. We all labor in vain. This was the message God was sending me during my devotional time. I was spending so much energy working so hard to be successful. To stand out among my peers. To be faithful to God. And yet all the while God was calling me to rest. To trust. To stand back and let Him do the “building” of my life. Let Him guide and direct my path. Let Him have the glory for the success I was seeking to achieve. 

Over the last year, I’ve been learning more about the meaning of those three, God-given words in my life.  

• Obscurity - I love where I am. I love the people I serve. I love the team I get to serve alongside. We are not the largest or fastest growing or most “successful” church but we are a family. We serve God faithfully. We are producing gospel-fruit on a regular basis. Lives are being changed. People are being transformed. It is awesome to be part of! 
• Anonymity - I am released from the pressure to perform. To succceed. To self-promote. No one knows my name. This work isn’t about me. I love the fact that I don’t always have to be up front. Don’t always have to preach. Don’t always have to be in charge. I am simply one of the pastors at PEPC.  
• Insignificance - I am deeply aware of how truly insignificant my contributions to the Kingdom of God are in the grand scheme of things. The reality is I will be completely forgotten within a generation or so of my death. My own family won’t remember who I was or what I did. All my accomplishments and achievements will quickly turn to dust. And that’s okay. Because my significance is not found in what I do but in who God is and I am content simply to serve Him in whatever way He sees fit.  

Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Where do you need to step back and let God build in your life? In what areas do you need to hand over the tools, stop working so hard, and let God take over? Whose blueprint are you operating from? Yours or God’s? 

Who is God?

Readings for the day: Psalms 89, 96, 100, 101, 107

Our God is far too small. The human mind is simply too finite to fully comprehend the height and depth and breadth of His majesty and glory and splendor. His wisdom is higher than our wisdom. His ways are higher than our ways. His power is limitless. His knowledge unsearchable. His love unconditional. His grace knows no ends. There is no boundaries to God. No barriers. Nothing He cannot do. Nothing He cannot accomplish. Nothing stands outside His will. Nothing opposes Him. Nothing threatens Him. Nothing can move Him. “For who in the skies can be compared to the Lord? Who among the heavenly beings is like the Lord...” (Psalms‬ ‭89:6‬)

Our God is far too small. In an effort to understand Him, we tend to cut Him down to our size. Reduce Him to a much more manageable state. We question His goodness. We question His omnipotence. We question His wisdom. Rather than stand on the truth that we are made in God’s image, we reverse engineer the process. We remake God in our image to our everlasting regret. For the god we “make” is an idol. Weak. Empty. Imperfect. A god who can do nothing, see nothing, accomplish nothing. A god who cannot be trusted or relied upon in the most difficult of circumstances. A god who is helpless in the face of our suffering. Recently, a progressive friend of mine rehashed an old argument on suffering. She wrote, “We have three options in the face of real suffering. 1) God is not good. 2) God is not loving. 3) God is not all-powerful.” Her argument is that surely a good and loving and all-powerful God would not allow all the suffering in the world therefore we must question either His goodness, His love, or His power. But this is a false premise. This is an argument made without all the facts. We see from such a limited perspective. Her god is too small.

Consider for a moment what my friend is really asking. If God had chosen to remove suffering and pain from the world at the beginning of time. If, even after Adam and Eve fell into disobedience, God would not allow human beings to suffer the consequences of the choices they make. What would that do to free will? What would that do to human agency? What would that do to human choices? It would destroy them. We would never grow into maturity. Never become the partners God created us to be. And even more fundamentally, it wrecks the whole purpose of the Cross. If suffering and pain is always evil and always to be avoided and always wrong, then the suffering and pain and death of Jesus also falls into that category. 

Our God is far too small. And that’s we need to immerse ourselves in God’s Word. God’s Word declares clearly the goodness and love and power of God.  “O Lord God of hosts, who is mighty as you are, O Lord, with your faithfulness all around you?...The heavens are yours; the earth also is yours; the world and all that is in it, you have founded them....You have a mighty arm; strong is your hand, high your right hand. Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne; steadfast love and faithfulness go before you.” This is our God! The Glory of Israel! He is mighty to save! Mighty to deliver! Faithful in love! Over and over again, our God declares His love for His people. Never leaving them. Never forsaking them. Even when we run from Him, He will relentlessly pursue. Even when we reject Him, He will never abandon us. “My steadfast love I will keep for him forever, and my covenant will stand firm for him. I will establish his offspring forever and his throne as the days of the heavens...Blessed be the Lord forever! Amen and Amen.” (Psalms‬ ‭89:8, 11, 13-14, 28-29, 52‬)

Friends, there is only one way to see God for who He truly is. Only one way to know God on His terms. First, we must trust His revelation of Himself. We must look to Jesus in whom the fullness of God was pleased to dwell. He is the pre-eminent and unique and complete revelation of the One True God. Second, we must trust His Word. The Word of God is the unique and authoritative witness to the truth of God. We must trust God’s Word and lean not on our own limited understanding. We must trust God’s Word more than what we think or how we feel. We must believe God is who He declares Himself to be or we have so little hope. 

Serenity

Readings for the day: Psalms 15, 23, 24, 25, 47

Recently, our staff went on a retreat. As a part of our time together, we went through the Enneagram. For those not familiar, the Enneagram is a tool to help a person grow in self-understanding. It helps you identify your basic fears, drives, and desires. It gives you a pathway to health, virtue, and holiness. It also reveals your susceptibility to particular temptations, vices, and stress. I certainly don’t pretend to be an expert but even our brief foray into the Enneagram was super helpful as we sought to get to know and understand each other as a team. 

I am a “one” on the Enneagram. A perfectionist whose primal fears are corruption, deceit, imbalance, and immorality. These fears lead to stress which creates anxiety. When I am anxious, I tend to be resentful, even angry. My buttons get pushed and I literally can feel my blood begin to boil inside. In the face of these feelings, my temptation is to deny them. Play the hypocrite. Not acknowledge my anger because it is not morally good and therefore must be rejected. This results in continual self-recrimination. The critical voices in my head rise to a cacophony of shame and condemnation as I fail to live up to my own high ideals. It’s frankly exhausting. 

“O Lord, who shall sojourn in your tent? Who shall dwell on your holy hill? He who walks blamelessly and does what is right and speaks truth in his heart...” (Psalms‬ ‭15:1-2‬)  

“Who shall ascend the hill of the Lord? And who shall stand in his holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to what is false and does not swear deceitfully.” (Psalms‬ ‭24:3-4‬)

 “Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me! Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you. May integrity and uprightness preserve me, for I wait for you.” (Psalms‬ ‭25:20-21‬)

This stuff is music to a “one’s” ears. It speaks my love language. Goodness. Righteousness. Moral uprightness. Holy perfection. All good things. All important things. And yet, none of these things actually lead me to health. They do not assuage my anxiety. They only serve to feed my fears. They throw me back on my own strength. My own effort. Which I already know is never enough. So what’s a “one” to do? Continue playing the hypocrite? Continuing pretending he or she has it all together? Continue presenting an image to the world that is good and upright and moral? 

By no means! The “one” must instead cling to message of Psalm 23. One of my favorites, by the way.  “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.” (Psalms‬ ‭23:1-3‬) Peace comes as I trust in the Lord. Serenity comes as my soul rests in Him. All my stress. All my anxieties. All my fears fade away when I let the Lord be my shepherd. He takes care of all my wants. He makes me lie down and rest in green pastures, beside still waters. These words are balm to my soul. 

This morning when I woke, I found my heart had reset to its default position. (This happens pretty much every morning by the way!) As soon as I opened my eyes, the voices in my head start clamoring for attention. “Get up! You have so much to do! So much to accomplish! You’re already behind! You’re already letting people down! You’re already failing!” As I said above, my temptation is to argue. To fight. To try to silence those voices through my own Herculean efforts. But God charts a different path for me. The path of grace. And His Words became my words as I pray, “To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul. O my God, in you I trust; let me not be put to shame; let not my enemies exult over me...He leads the humble in what is right, and teaches the humble his way. All the paths of the Lord are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep his covenant and his testimonies...The friendship of the Lord is for those who fear him, and he makes known to them his covenant...Oh, guard my soul, and deliver me! Let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.” (Psalms‬ ‭25:1-2, 9-10, 14, 20‬) As God’s voice fills my head and heart, I find the other voices retreating into the background. Yes, they are still there but it’s more of a murmur than a roar and I can now go about my day filled with God’s peace. 

How does God speak to you? To your basic fears? Primal drives? Baseline desires? How does He lead you to health and wholeness and healing and peace?  

True Worship

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 5:11-25, 6, and 1 Chronicles 13, 14, 15, 16

What is true worship? Is it a feeling? A style? An experience? How do we know if we’ve engaged in true worship? Is it because we leave feeling inspired? The preacher’s message warmed our hearts? We’ve eaten the bread and drunk of the cup? The music for the morning matched our musical tastes? What are the hallmarks of true worship? Authenticity? Sincerity? We’re able to identify something we get out of it? 

Sadly, all of the above are true. Worship in 21st century North America has turned largely inward. It is focused, evaluated, planned, produced for the human experience. It caters to the preferences and tastes of the worshipper. It is designed primarily to make the human being feel inspired, motivated, and connected. This “inward turn” is as true for the small church as it is for the mega-church and every church in between. And it’s why we see so many Christians bounce from church to church to church over the course of their lives. Long gone are the days when one would INVEST their entire lives into one community come what may. Long gone are the days when Christians would heed the BIBLICAL command to actually practice forgiveness and reconciliation when relationships get hard. Long gone are the days when Christians would DIE TO SELF, laying aside the consumer tendencies of taste. Preference. Personal favorites. As a result, long gone are the days when the church produced robust, courageous, bold, self-sacrificing disciples of Jesus who would give their lives for the sake of the gospel and the Kingdom of God in this world. Not that it never happens, it just is more then exception rather than the rule. 

So what is true worship? It is the worship God both deserves and demands. Believe it or not, God cares deeply how He is worshipped. In 1 Chronicles 13, we see what happens when God’s people - with sincere and authentic devotion in their hearts - fail to worship God in the way He commands. The people have gathered. They’re excited to bring the Ark of the Covenant into Jerusalem. They call the priests. They call the Levites. They plan a huge celebration.  The whole nation is present to witness this incredible moment. They build a new cart to carry the ark in the procession. David and all of Israel are celebrating, singing, dancing before the Lord with all their might. But then an ox stumbles. Uzzah, seeking to protect the ark, puts out his hand to keep it steady. The Lord strikes him down. One can imagine the shock of the crowd. In an instant, all the music and dancing and celebration stops. Silence. Long, prolonged, awkward silence as the people come to grips with what’s just happened. David is angry. He pouts for three months, refusing to come to grips with the fact that he himself is somewhat responsible for what happened. His decision to do what was convenient (build a cart to carry the ark) rather than what God demanded (Levites carry the ark on their own shoulders) is ultimately what cost Uzzah his life. Fast forward to 1 Chronicles 15. A different picture emerges. David is ready. He is humble. He submits to God’s will. He decrees that “no one but the Levites may carry the ark of God, for the Lord had chosen them to carry the ark of the Lord and to minister to him forever.” (1 Chron. ‭15:2‬) Once again, the celebration commences. Singing. Dancing. Music. Right sacrifices. God is pleased. God accepts the worship David offers because it is singularly focused on honoring God. 

What does true worship look like in our context today? Obviously, none of us know where the Ark of the Covenant resides. (Except Indiana Jones, of course!) The ceremonial laws that governed Old Testament worship have been fulfilled in Christ. Does this set us free then to worship as we choose? To do what feels good? To set the needs of the worshipper above the clear, biblical command to worship God and Him alone?

Pastors/worship leaders...is the primary thrust of your worship planning to bring honor and glory to God? To set Him high and lifted up? Or is it to meet the needs of your people? When you evaluate worship, do you measure it in terms of attendance and the emotional engagement of God’s people or the clarity of the gospel message preached through music, Word, and Sacrament?

People of God...is your primary goal in worship to get something out of it? To walk away feeling inspired, emotionally uplifted? Do you evaluate your own experience based on whether you liked the songs that were sung or felt moved by the experience? Do you evaluate the message based on its applicability to your own life?  

Please hear me clearly...I am not saying these things are bad. Or should be divorced from our worship experience. I am simply saying they are SECONDARY to our primary duty in worship which is to worship God as He both deserves and demands. This, in fact, is the chief end of our existence. 

Unity

Readings for the day: 2 Samuel 5:1-10, 1 Chronicles 11, 12, and Psalm 133

 “Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers and sisters dwell in unity!...For there the Lord has commanded the blessing, life forevermore.” Psalms‬ ‭133:1, 3‬)

Psalm 133 is my favorite Psalm. Mainly because I have seen it in action. I have seen what happens when God’s people truly serve Him with one heart and mind. I have witnessed the miracles that take place when God’s people put aside their egos, their needs, their wants, their desires in favor of serving the Kingdom. I have watched God’s Spirit move when God’s people humble themselves. Deny themselves. Pursue forgiveness and reconciliation. Lay aside their need to be safe, both physically and emotionally. It is powerful. Life-changing. It transforms villages. Towns. Cities. Entire tribes, regions, and nations.  

True biblical unity requires us to relinquish “self” in favor of others. It requires us to lose our individual identity in favor of the whole. (Job 38:7) It requires us to consider others more important than ourselves.  (Phil. 2:3) It requires us to risk. Risk being hurt. Risk being wounded. Risk feeling rejected. It requires us to have courage. Courage to forgive. Courage to pursue reconciliation. No matter what the cost. No matter how many times we get burned. “Then Peter came up and said to him, "Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.” (Matthew‬ ‭18:21-22‬) It requires honesty. Transparency. Self-reflection. We must constantly seek to take the log out of our own eyes before we look to take the speck out of our brother’s or sister’s eye. We have to acknowledge we are both victim and perpetrator in all our relationships. 

True biblical unity requires the church to lay aside it’s need to compete. Extend it’s brand. Criticize other parts of the Body as if “we have no need of them.”   (1 Cor. 12:21) It requires leadership to get serious about working together. Working with and for one another. Willing to sacrifice our buildings, budgets, and attendance in order to expand God’s Kingdom in the communities where we serve. It requires mutual submission and accountability. A willingness to step aside and relinquish our platforms when we fall into sin. It requires a radical commitment to love God and neighbor at the expense of our organizations and institutions. Self-denial and picking up our cross is not just a call to the individual Christian but to the church as a community as well! 

True biblical unity requires a radical re-orientation of the heart. It is incredibly difficult and challenging which is why it happens so infrequently in Scripture. The unity David experiences as he builds his kingdom will soon give way to division as his own children betray him. We have to constantly be on guard because we are our own worst enemy. Our hearts naturally resist unity because it requires literal death to self. And we have such a strong instinct for self-preservation.  

Ultimately, unity is not something we can achieve through our own strength. It must be a movement of God’s Spirit. “For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body—Jews or Greeks, slaves or free—and all were made to drink of one Spirit.” (1 Cor. ‭12:13‬) Have you drunk of the one Spirit? Have you tasted the goodness and glory of God? Are you walking with the Spirit? Keeping in step with Him in all your ways? Unity comes as we relinquish more and more of our lives to the Spirit’s control. Both as individuals and as churches gathered in His name. 

Genealogy and Race

Readings for the day: 1 Chronicles 7, 8, 9

The key verse in today’s reading is 1 Chronicles 9:1, “So all Israel was recorded in genealogies, and these are written in the Book of the Kings of Israel. And Judah was taken into exile in Babylon because of their breach of faith.” Why are all these names important? Why are the generations laid down with such detail and specificity? Why record Israel according to their respective tribes? What’s at stake here? Identity. Connection. History. Even their relationship with God. Israel took their history seriously. They took God’s Word seriously. Even after they were carted off to exile in Babylon and were faced with the temptation to intermarry and lose their connection to their past, Israel remained faithful. They knew God had set apart the Levites to serve Him as priests. So the Levites remained set apart even in exile. They knew God had given authority to the tribe of Judah to reign and to rule. So the tribe of Judah continued to serve as princes and leaders for God’s people. They knew David and Samuel had set apart certain families as gatekeepers, guardians of the Lord’s treasury, etc. So they made sure these families retained those roles. And when Israel finally did return from exile, you see the descendents of these great men and women re-connecting to their glorious past. 

Most of us have never been carried into exile. Most of us have not had our identities wiped out. We’ve not had our history erased. We’ve not had our connection to our ancestors severed. At the same time, many among us have had this terrible and tragic experience. I think of the Native American men and women I have known. Their people lived on this continent for hundreds of years before the arrival of the first European explorers. They lost their land. They were forcibly relocated. They were forced to forgo the key rituals and give up the key rhythms that connected them to their history and their tribal identity. Their stories are terrible and heartbreaking. I think of the African-American men and women I have known. Their ancestors brought over on slave ships across the Atlantic. Their connection to their land severed. Their connection to their history erased. Their connection to their past lost. They were given new names. Were forced to take on new identities. They suffered in slavery for hundreds of years including economic slavery after officially being emancipated during the Civil War. Their stories are terrible and heartbreaking. 

It’s vital for those of us who have not suffered at the scale of others to humble ourselves and listen to those who have endured such pain and loss. It is important for us to become advocates for them and allies with them in their fight to re-connect to their glorious past. We must pluck up the courage to face the difficult and complex issues that arise as a result. Issues such as national repentence, formal apologies, legal and economic reparations, etc. are not easy to tackle. We must remember how much we rejoiced when the nation of Israel was restored in 1948 and continue to work for similar restoration for our brothers and sisters of color right here at home.

I certainly don’t pretend to have all the answers. I know the way forward is difficult. But I have to believe as we work for the good of one another. As we celebrate the history and culture and diversity God has created among human beings on this planet. As we help each other re-connect to something deeper. A deeper identity. A deeper story. A deeper truth. I have to believe God will reveal Himself in that process in a powerful way because this “genealogical impulse” exists within all of us. In a very real sense, Israel’s story is our story for all of us can ultimately trace our lineage back to the same common source. Adam and Eve. The first man. The first woman. Made in the image of God by the hand of God for the glory of God. This is truly our heritage.